I kind of want to take back the “fem” in “femme fatale.” The connotation around that term is controversial. Some take it positively representing a woman in power and gender norm reversal — I think it represents a misogynistic and fearful take on feminism, victimizing the men and thereby placing them in a position of entitlement and self-gratification. The same old institutionalized oppression is so finely engrained within our culture that it’s virtually everywhere once you stop to take a look.

But reclaiming this doesn’t mean being superior, and to stand up for rights does not mean to want domination. As difficult as this concept is to grasp — we really just want to be viewed as human beings.

I’m just one person. I attempt to battle my way through the world, just like everyone else. But it only starts with one person, and I need release. Through the anxiety, through the obstacles, I want to be able to create an outlet upon which I can look back at myself and say: Yeah. That happened to me. And I overcame it.

I’m also particularly concerned with the negative stigma surrounding traditionalistic cultures. Being a part of south asian culture, there’s just so much closed-mindedness that it’s honestly aggravating to even begin the conversation. Women are commonly silenced and thrown around like they’re nothing — and young girls have no way of gaining necessary knowledge or insight that could make them better informed or even save their lives. And this wholeheartedly bothers me.

I don’t want to serve as some influential leader, or get you to “buy my new book! 12 steps to improve your life!” That’s not what I’m here for. I am doing this for myself, mostly. But you’re welcome to tag along aboard the journey.

If my anxiety is really a determining factor in how I communicate to people in my life, let me find a place to say all that I really want to say. Let me bring up issues like social anxiety, like depression, like infanticide and rape and poverty — like how there’s no sex education being provided in areas like Pakistan and India, just because it’s considered “sinful” to talk about.

I want to talk about the flawlessness and resilience of women globally, their struggle, their voices unheard. But I also want to discuss how awesome we can be. I want to talk about fashion and beauty and femininity, because badassery and the former are not exclusive. And I want to talk about my interests: From TV to movies to sci-fi to anime to anything else that traverses my mind. Whether it’s news, updates, or thoughts — honestly? I kind of just want to write.


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